Sunday, May 16, 2010

Andy Rooney on Women over 40

In case you missed it on 60 Minutes, this is what Andy Rooney thinks about women over 40:

As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all.
Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night
and ask, 'What are you thinking?'
She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game,

she doesn't sit around whining about it.
She does something she wants to do,
and it's usually more interesting.

Women over 40 are dignified.

They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera
or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.
Of course, if you deserve it,
they won't hesitate to shoot you
if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved.

They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

Women get psychic as they age.

You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two,
a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest.

They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk or
if you are acting like one.
You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal.

For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40,
there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants
making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress.
Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say,
'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?',
here's an update for you.
Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage.
Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying
an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Andy Rooney is a really smart guy!


  1. Yeah for Andy Rooney. Love this and it is just so darn true.

  2. What a wonderful article!
    If only more men would realize these truths...

  3. Wonderful! I love the wit and wisdom of Andy Rooney.
    Now excuse me while I wipe my; morning coffee from the keyboard.

  4. Love it! Now here is a man who has gained LOTS of widom with his age. Love the pig/sausage line...hahahahahahahah!

  5. I love it! heard it before, but definately worth a refresher!

    Have a wonderful Sunday!

  6. Andy Rooney did not write this. Please check out Lots of stuff on the internet is falsely attributed to him.


    Nice to see you today!


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